10-Way Tie! Democrat Presidential Candidates Awarded Participation Trophies In First DNC Debate

"I couldn’t understand them half the time, but they were so cute, and one tried having a different opinion. It was just adorable." said one moderator

UPDATE: After dubbing the debate in English we found the REAL winner, click here to find out.

(Miami) — The first DNC debate had no runaway winner, because they were all winners tonite.

That’s right.

This night will go down in American history as the first 10-way tie in a Presidential debate. 

One of the moderators had this to say,

"I couldn't understand them half the time, but they were so cute, and one tried having a different opinion. It was just adorable."

Savannah Guthrie

Another moderator was screaming “RUSSIA” repeatedly.

After being escorted off stage for saying we should stop the endless wars, Tulsi Gabbard’s sister tweeted in defense of her.

Interestingly, the first Native American Presidential candidate didn’t virtue signal about it, nor did anyone call her out for becoming a white woman just months before the debate.

Tomorrow, June 27th, kicks off part 2 of the world’s most boring event first 2019 DNC debate.

Coverage of the debate begins 7pm Central Time.

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